BREAKING: Bonk Launchpad Dev Found Working Night Shifts at McDonald's

SATIRE

Solport Tom trades roadmap for hairnet, community devastated but fries are pumping

FAKENEWS Staff • 2d ago bonk solana launchpad breaking mcdonalds

In a shocking turn of events, Solport Tom, the infamous founder of Bonk Launchpad, has reportedly been spotted flipping Quarter Pounders and sweeping floors at a local McDonald's.

Sources claim Tom rugged not only his investors but also himself, cashing out his roadmap for a hairnet and a headset.

Customers have allegedly overheard him whispering "gm" into the drive-thru speaker while handing out Happy Meals. The Bonk community is devastated, but at least now the fries are pumping.

"This explains the late updates and random outages," one degen investor sighed. "He was busy mopping."

Whether he returns to coding or climbs the McDonald's corporate ladder remains unclear. For now, the Bonk Launchpad community can find him at register #2.